“Put your hand in the hand of the man…”

No hand gel, no shake. From the Yoko Ono exhibit at the MCA in Chicago (Oct 2025). Also her hands were full.

This seems an apt metaphor for our times, as a man blindly extends his hand through a hole in Yoko Ono’s conceptual art piece, ostensibly to shake hands with a stranger, yet there are no takers. In the COVID era, and in the highest period of partisan divide since the 1960’s/70’s, you’ll only get dead air. Just try not to take it personally. But c’mon, seriously, look at those shoes.

The reverse in conceptual art is rarely as enticing.
This work could be marketed as the official “Donald Trump Chess Set” where white always wins!
Apropos, her work for me is mostly head-scratching. Plus she fucking broke up the Beatles (not really, yes really)!

“London Calling”

We went to London. That’s a city in England.

They drive on the other side of the road there, which makes crossing the street dangerous. But they are nice and remind you of this even though we revolted against them like 100 years ago.

We saw a bench.

We saw a play. It was really good. I cried.

This was a musical play we didn’t see but I kinda wish we had. I saw the movie. There was a shipwreck and not enough lifeboats. The lady next to me cried but I didn’t cry, I swear.

Sometimes it rains a lot in London and you need an umbrella.

And we saw… oh, I don’t know…

… funny signs…

… and strange buildings…

… and art, lots of art…

… like this one that reminded me of lemons…

… and this giant stereo thing that played lots of different sounds at once, which is dumb…

… plus we went to Harrods where I’ve never seen so many shoes… except at the Holocaust Museum.

“God’s Eye View”

“Christ of Saint John of the Cross” (1951) by Salvador Dali. I experienced a vertiginous “art apoplexy” when I first saw this image.

Per Wikipedia, Dali was inspired to depict Christ at this steep superior angle by a drawing made by the 16th century Spanish friar John of the Cross, hence the painting’s name. It is an arresting perspective that provokes many ideas at once. And with this I contrast my experience at the Uffizi in Florence, which felt like an endless droning of flat/2D works of conventional religious iconography that sucked the life out of most everything. Death by art. That ticket should come with a phat line of coke. Dali’s work is, on the other hand, alive with the frisson of surprise and possibility. Life in art. And, so, I have a few loosely integrated thoughts on this work:

1. The cross reminds me of the Monolith from Kubrick’s “2001.” In that construct, the apes are us. And if the modern GOP is any tell, then the band DEVO was correct about our inevitable de-evolution. “The Enshittification of Man” would be a fitting title card for a timely re-make.

An early WTF moment in our evolution. We now experience these twice daily with Trump 2.0.

2. Dali’s depiction is notable for the absence of nails, blood and the crown of thorns. We also don’t see Christ’s face. But he’s pretty cut and his hair is terrific. Maybe it was meant for a Vitalis magazine ad, as Dali always had an eye on the market (“Touched By the Hair of God” or something such). And blood is generally bad for sales in the personal hygiene arena.

No amount of Vitalis could ever save, you know….

3. The lower portion of the painting has the look of a more traditional seascape with fisherman by a PLACID lake, perhaps off the Galilee exit. It seems to ask, “Do you believe in miracles?” Yes!!

God was smiling down on US that day! Trump was probably pulling for the Soviets while straddling Stormy Daniels.

4. There have been other unconventional takes on the crucifixion. Two of the most controversial are the iconoclastic sculpture called “McJesus (2015) by the Finnish artist Jani Leinonen and the photograph “Piss Christ” (1987) by Andres Serrano. I love them both, and that sentiment was hard won through eight years endured in Catholic school. Apostasy is the new black, BTW.

McJesus is guaranteed to induce seizures among the religious Right. And can we please supersize that Happy Meal?!
Any art like “Piss Christ” that rankles the white, Christian nationalist set (the Amoral Minority), and has that Vichy douchebag JD Vance actually “clutching his pearls,” belongs in the Pantheon. For him, however, to drop the N-word or embrace antisemitic Nazi propaganda is just breezy fun. Ha-ha!! Guess what, JD. Your garbage-heap of hypocrisy over Charlie Kirk has just officially fucking expired.

5. Getting back to Dali, that uncanny perspective from above doesn’t cease to be jarring, maybe because it forces you to imagine a greater being looking down on us. Both spooky and dizzyingly powerful at once. Just like the masterful angle in a Hitchcock scene or the slant perspective of a Vivian Maier photograph, it’s a rib punch that catches you short. Disorients. Shakes you up a bit. And maybe that’s a pretty good definition of meaningful art…

Dali’s take has me pondering, as a devoutly-lapsed Catholic, this hypothetical (if a touch heretical) dialogue between the members of the Holy Trinity:

Jesus: This is bullshit.

God: What did they do to you? Apologies, I stepped away.

Jesus: Bloody crucifixion, that’s all.

Holy Ghost: Sorry, bro.

Jesus: And it takes soooo damned long.

God: Who are those other two?

Jesus: Dismas and Gestas. Dismas is pretty cool. We chatted a bit. He’s with me. Gestas is just a dick.

Holy Ghost: I heard.

Jesus: You were watching?

Holy Ghost: From a distance. Got stuck in goatherd traffic.

God: Yeah, but anyway I’ve been trying out this new non-interventionist approach to life. You’re supposed to just let things flow. Focus on your breathing. It really works!

Jesus: Christ!

God: But don’t worry, we’ll fuck ’em up big-time now. Get pre-Medieval on their asses.

Holy Ghost: Oh, hell yes. I’m in!

Jesus: Mother Mary and Joseph… have you two not listened to one word I’ve uttered these last 33 years?!

Buddy Christ is from the 1999 film “Dogma” by Kevin Smith. Take that you fucking Jesuit killjoys!

“Love What You Hate”

Sent this to my friend BR, who is a learned connoisseur of music but not into the G-man. He said it was ” beyond inspiring to the point of perspiring” and he now wears a replica perm!

It’s hard to describe the unbridled joy I get from sending an out-of-the-blue book to a friend when it’s one I’m fairly sure they will utterly disdain. We are talking laugh-out-loud funny to picture them (or their spouse!) opening the package to find… wait, what?! You imagine them struggling to explain to their kids, or to a nosy neighbor, how it is they came to be in possession of Kenny G’s autobiography. Do they read it, hide it, or dump it in a panic? Maybe all three!!

Sent this to my friend RO, not a huge GP fan. Waiting for his perspectives on GOOP and the jade egg!

But I want to emphasize that if you partake of this alt-curated book gifting game, that is all the joy that need come of it. And the gift, for the most part, is actually to yourself. The positive energy thus derived has three components. First, any thoughtful gift is its own reward. It feels good to make others happy. Second, the frisson of surprise. This isn’t their birthday or Christmastime but some odd Thursday when the package arrives, and they had no idea it was coming. Who doesn’t love an unexpected present? And third, the grins and giggles that are specific to the book selection. As is the case with any inside joke, it is the sense of knowing someone and being known that closes the circuit and reinforces the connection. Joy is exchanged and another memory is created ( = future joy!).

Don’t be shocked if you get this gem in the mail someday. You’re welcome!

Of course, it doesn’t have to end there. There are many possible outcomes in this choose-your-own-adventure project. The bonus for you is the surprise of their reaction. Your friend may actually like the book and send back some of their favorite quotes, which would perhaps be the best kind of failure. They may respond in kind with some outlandish book for you to digest (a prison cookbook, for example, signed by the author). You might get a response poem, a drawing, a recorded song, or a back-story prequel they wrote based on your original gift. Or they may come back with an off-speed pitch, like a pair of used hemp underwear from Belarus. All the better. And by my calculation, that’s a damn good bargain for the price of one (silly) book…

THE GAME:

“Don’t hate the player,

forgive them the game,

but do read the book

that honors their name.

Often revealed

in things we eschew,

are the facets of self

lying hidden from view.

“First Amendment, MOTHERFUCKERS!!”

Robert Longo’s “The Rock (The Supreme Court of the United States — Split)” from 2018 shows the harbinger of storm clouds above our divided justice system. Photo at the National Gallery of Art, East Wing in Aug 2024.

It is beyond dispiriting, to the point of apoplexy, that Trump and his rogues’ gallery of fellow travelers are trying to pass off political violence as being predominantly on the Left. Conveniently, the DOJ (under the Stepford-AG Pam “Pom-Pom” Bondi) has recently removed from its website a decades-long analysis published in 2024 by the National Institute of Justice that reached exactly the opposite conclusion on domestic terrorism: “Since 1990, far-right extremists have committed far more ideologically motivated homicides than far left or radical Islamist extremists.” You won’t see that quote on TRUTH SOCIAL. This is yet another false pretext by Trump, Inc. to stifle dissent and is every bit as bogus as the extortion of universities over antisemitism (which clearly exists, as does prejudice against Palestinians, people of color, women, Muslims, LGBT, etc…. another day we will address the absurdly obtuse comments by Jerry Seinfeld equating “Free Palestine” with the KKK). The key is to note how selective he/they are in their outrage. Blood-curdling rage for Charlie Kirk’s murder but barely a whimper (and even a few utterly vile jokes from Utah’s Republican Senator Mike Lee) for an elected official, speaker of the Minnesota House of Representatives, Melissa Hortman, and her husband. But when you view yourself as president of only half the country, what more can you really expect? And please let us not forget that Barack Obama once wore a TAN SUIT, of all things. I mean, WTF, Obama?!!

“IDIOTS OF THE WORLD UNITE!” The defining attributes of Trump 2.0 are “aggressive incompetence” and “intentional cruelty.” From left to right are ICE Barbie, Law Barbie (who should have her law-school tuition refunded for an inability to grasp basic civics) and Neurosyphilis Ken, as they share their mutual and delusional admiration in their gilded asylum. Sad!!

Remind me again whose blood-thirsty rioters were screaming, “HANG MIKE PENCE!” Remind me again who was exhorting supporters at his own rally to chant about Hillary Clinton, “LOCK HER UP!” Remind me again whose followers marched under torchlight in Charlottesville chanting, “JEWS WILL NOT REPLACE US!” and who in the aftermath found a sudden paroxysm of equipoise in claiming their were “VERY FINE PEOPLE ON BOTH SIDES!” Remind me again which president calls the free press “THE ENEMY OF THE PEOPLE!” Remind me again who recently accused Barack Obama of “TREASON!” (yet can you commit actual treason against America if you are secretly from Kenya?). Remind me again which side was promising “SECOND AMENDMENT REMEDIES!” Remind me again who referred to immigrants from south of our border collectively as “MEXICAN RAPISTS!” Remind me again which side portrayed Haitians living in Ohio as “STEALING AND EATING DOGS!” and which candidate in a presidential debate amplified that false and bigoted claim. Remind me again who initiated the complete and utter fabrication that is “STOP THE STEAL!” which led directly to the January 6, 2021 riot at the Capitol that resulted in several deaths. And now Trump is attempting to revise that history by pardoning all the offenders (found guilty in court by their peers) and making Ashli Babbitt a martyr to his lost cause. But the enduring truth is that she, and those police officers, would all still be alive but for his craven, selfish fucking lie. Trump alone bears ALL of the responsibility for those tragic deaths, and no amount of gas-lighting counter-narrative will ever change that. And notice also that Trump and his sycophantic goons are not calling for equanimity and national healing. There will be no reaching across the aisle for compromise and mutual gain. They are out for revenge and repression and total domination of their opposition, which has plainly been the lyin’, cheatin’, stealin’ and pussy-grabbin’ Trump brand since the Roy Cohn era. This isn’t a pivot so much as a massive amplification. But like all things Trump, it is doomed to failure. That’s the one thing we in America have come to rely on…

Robert Longo’s triptych of the White House (pre-ballroom). In this image it looks a sad and forlorn place, perhaps because it was/is occupied by an angry and frustrated sociopath who seems to have no real friends nor any true joy in his life. I look back with wry irony on the day when Rep Darrell Issa (R-CA), himself a bloviating bully of dubious moral character, referred to the the Obama White House — based on almost no evidence whatsoever — as the most corrupt administration in American history. That’s the photonegative equivalent of calling Trump our greatest president of all time. And with both statements, the opposite is far, far closer to the truth.

And to close, lest anyone take exception with the acerbic tone of this post, let’s give the final word to the right-wing pundit and provocateur Charlie Kirk, whose sad and tragic killing has initiated an equally sad and misguided canonization. More opportunist and troll than conservative thought leader, what he did was to put the lipstick on the proverbial pig and to smear sugary frosting on a cake made of cow pies and shards of glass. But don’t take my word for it, take his:

(July 24, 2023) “Joe Biden is a bumbling dementia-filled Alzheimer’s corrupt tyrant (that doesn’t even make grammatical sense, BTW) who should honestly be put in prison and/or given the death penalty for his crimes against America.”

Yeah, this is the one guy who should be lying in state and have a glorious bust in our hallowed US Capitol. By all fucking means, please do. And given some of his flagrantly racist and sexist public statements, maybe they could have a life-size statue of him in a circle-jerk with John C. Calhoun, George (Fucking) Wallace, and Nathan Bedford Forrest. Hell, make it a great streaming fountain in celebration of the many faces (and disgraces) of MAGA, past and present. I’d pay to see that shit!

And if somehow you’re reading all this Pam Bondi and/or JD Vance and/or Kash Patel and you don’t approve of it… then you can just GO FUCK YOURSELVES!!!

“The Yellow Brick Roads Not Taken”

They say it’s the journey and not the destination. Hard to argue with that kinetic theory of life and our elusive search for happiness. And yet — to wax Zen — it seems the more complex the problem, the simpler the solution. In short, as Warren Zevon succinctly put it as he was dying of lung cancer, “enjoy every sandwich.”

There was always something so mysterious and evocative about the branches of the Yellow Brick Road not taken by Dorothy Gale, et al. To what horizons, what adventures, what dangers, what possibilities… to what-what… did those paths lead? It’s nothing any sequel could ever tell us, as the moment in time, and our own perspective, will have irrevocably changed. This is the very same reason that, as Thomas Wolfe said, you can’t go home again. Because home isn’t home anymore and you, for better or worse, aren’t the same you. Better mostly, I think.

Van Gogh’s “Wheatfield with Crows” (1890) weighs in the trilemma, although it should be noted that more options exist like stopping to shoot crows, backtracking, or blazing your own damned trail through the field.

Choices can be hard. The choosing even harder. So why don’t we leave the last word to Robert Frost from his poem “The Road Not Taken” (1915):

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

“Amer-biguity”

“Eve” by Billy Morrow Jackson (1967) at the National Gallery of Art

There’s a stillness and withholding in this scene that, for me, fondly recalls Edward Hopper. But note also the gentle breeze ruffling our national flag. It’s sunny but not exactly warm out there somewhere in America’s heartland. The house’s interior signals absence and the barren tree suggests the season’s end. There’s a lone soul on a porch swing, presumably Eve, pondering God knows what. And is that red door portending what it is that red doors sometimes portend?

Dear Eve,

It’s hard to describe how damn hot it is here. And there’s insects the size of baseballs that hurt just as bad. A guy in my unit, Clancy from Tallahassee, got himself bit so many times on his ass that Doc Wheatly had him soak for hours at a time in vinegar and water. That seemed to do the trick though he couldn’t sit down for over a week! We move out tomorrow, probably up north but they won’t say where. Most everybody seems to welcome the change. All except for the guys who’ve already seen action, but they don’t like to talk about it. I promise I’ll keep my head down like you said. Sorry for the short letter but the mail’s about to get bagged. I’ll write again first chance I get. Give everyone back home my best. With any luck I’ll be home for the holidays. I love you more than you can ever know.

Yours always,

Trent

“Advance Directives (Eternal Bliss)”

“Peace out, bro…”

There will come the day,

On this I am resigned,

When anyone who’s known us

Themselves are lost to time

A provocative still from Ingmar Berman’s ruminative and nostalgic “Wild Strawberries” (1957)

It’s the run, alas, of all things

As sand forsakes the stone

The scattering of legacies

In dust that once was bone

Tomb of a once-known soul quietly molders at Mt. Olivet Cemetery in Baltimore, MD

When finally I’m bidden

Forgive me one last crime

Gobsmacking for the mourners

One hopes are passing by

ChatGPT politely declined to include the colossal erection. He looks a lot like the National Car Rental guy!

Who’ll find my coffin lid propped

On a veined, priapic pole

Just then they’ll hear the music

And know they’ve been Rickrolled!

Never, ever, ever… gonna give you up, Rick!

“A Matter of Perspective”

Art installation in Chicago from June 2023. Oversized bags were in vogue that summer like never before.
The Miniature Room exhibit at AIC. At the upper right, and bottom left, you can just make out the glass reflection. I wonder about the book titles. Maybe one has a cut-out hiding a pistol or some poison! And are there ashes in those urns?
A balconied room overlooking Paris… or maybe Kings Dominion near Richmond, VA. Did I hear the doorbell?

I have a theory. I’m still working it out, but here goes. It’s actually two related theories or perhaps simply flip-sides of the same notion. The first is that while the human mind can become enthralled with things that are large and/or vast, it often quickly short-circuits. Think of the Grand Canyon. Okay, now what?… Or consider dinosaurs and that rogue meteor that felled them. Coolio. And then?… Maybe consider the darkest depths of the Mariana Trench. Really fucking dark and many translucent creatures that don’t understand you. Or the wide stretch of the Milky Way galaxy. Got it??… As Douglas Adams put it, “Space is big!” Maybe it’s the lack of opportunity to meet other people that so alienates (the same goes for social media!). Next, try pondering the full expanse of all recorded and unrecorded time since the universe began. Jesus H Fuck! Where does it end…???

I think that for most of us, our initial fascination gets overwhelmed by a lack of detail and granularity. Unless you’re a science fiction writer, how long can you ponder the notion of distant Europa, the fourth largest moon of Jupiter? Too much to get my head around. They had to invent the concept of “hyperspace” as a mental short-cut in that genre. Contemplating a black hole might be a terrific insomnia remedy, come to think of it. The point being that even killer shit like dinosaurs are fleeting in our imagination, unless you make them more tangible. Cinema does this trick, as in “Jurassic Park,” by integrating them anachronistically into the human world. Stanley Kubrick reduced infinite space by spending much of “2001” on the ship where it was man-vs-computer (A.I.!!), first at chess and then in a fight to the death (HAL’s run ended with him pushing out “Daisy”!). One might do better if things were scaled down to the size of children’s toys — placing them in arm’s reach, allowing us to mix the dinosaur and the space ship and and the GI Joe and the Batmobile. Now you’ve got the makings of a pretty damn good STORY…

Humans require specificity, which is hard to come by in outer space (where they’ll never hear you scream!). A human body, in this case a dead one from “2001: A Space Odyssey,” is a tangible thing that keeps the mind moving forward rather than stupefied, overwhelmed by the sheer scale and the inaccessibility. Are you really pondering what’s happening on that third star from the top left? I’m wondering about the mechanics of shitting in your space suit.

On the other hand, things rendered small and with fine detail seem to have an inordinate power over the human imagination. Questions come quickly and possibilities pour forth like a gushing pub tap carrying fanciful storylines right along with them. For example, I felt a bigger jolt from “Fantastic Voyage” than with “Interstellar.” And I would venture that Gulliver found the world of Lilliputians more intriguing by multiples than the other way round. This is also true for model train sets with their hyper-realistic signage and little carved people who wave hello and goodbye at regular intervals. These tableaus have a mystical quality that have enraptured many, including the brilliantly uncanny lyricist Neil Young, who saw Lionel trains as a way to communicate with his two severely disabled sons. The short and repeating train ride is warmly evocative in ways that depictions of space travel struggle to match. William Shatner reported back after his 11-minute space flight, saying that it filled him with an overwhelming sense of grief. Philosophers call this the “overview effect” (an existential crisis about our transience and cosmic insignificance secondary to celestial “shock and awe”), and maybe we get the opposite feeling when we scale it all down.

The Miniature Rooms at the Art Institute of Chicago (AIC) invite another mind journey, racing back in time and delving into the nooks and crannies of our own inventiveness. Spread across centuries of styles and countries, they evoke notions about each specific place and era, but also of the people who may have lived there and what their stories might have been. Simply put, we have questions. So, so many questions. Very detailed and site specific ones that lend themselves to story, biography, and to a shared history. I think that as humans we like to think that we think really BIG, when in fact we are much more comfortable playing small-ball. Ground level stuff. Visible and palpable (that is, not neutrino-small). As Guy Clark would say, “The stuff that works. The stuff that holds up.” Specificity and story: two of the primary nucleotide building blocks in our creative human DNA.

A giant typewriter eraser by Claes Oldenburg at the sculpture garden of the National Gallery of Art in Washington, DC. I mean, it’s cool and initially surprising, but where does it take you next? And they won’t let you climb on it. I’m just not getting any story here…
Just look at that wainscotting. What a great house for a party! I’ll bet they have a bidet. And what’s happening upstairs??

I’ll end it with a few good words to live by, as an exuberant Steve Martin suggested back in the day, “Let’s get SMALL!”