“In my mind I’m gone to Kanorado…”

My wife, acting fast, snapped the photo as we sped east along I-70 from Denver to Baltimore back in the summer of 2020. The name is a fun portmanteau of Kansas and Colorado, as it sits near the state line in western Kansas. To the city-slicker, life sure looks simpler out on the prairie, at least as regards the topography and town naming. That said, so many city names back east are ripped straight from the maps of Europe (Athens, Dover, Portsmouth, Rome, New York, New London, etc.), so points here for originality. And I find something hopeful about the picture. It’s Exit 1. A new beginning. Re-birth, of sorts (of course, driving west on the same road it would still be exit 1 but also the last exit in Kansas). You could run in those fields for days on end… although you might well be trespassing.

I finally decided to Google the place to uncover what the LACK of fuss was all about. In 2016 (per Wikipedia), the State of Kansas House of Representatives passed Resolution #6033 to designate Kanorado as the “Top City” of Kansas — due to it having the highest elevation at 3,907 feet. Now that’s funny! As of the 2020 census the population was 153 people, holding level since 2010 but down sharply from 2000 when it was a relative burgeoning 248. As the nosy outsider whom nobody asked, this was cause for some concern; but I was determined to remain optimistic. At least, that is, until I read the “Notable People” section. It lists but one lone soul. A Nancy Pfister who was murdered in 2014 with a hammer, axe, and lamp. Jesus, that is so damned deflating. A lamp?! I had hoped for a state finalist in something or other (wrestling, rodeo, auctioneering?). Or the per capita leader in Bible sales west of the Mississippi River. Or home to the the world’s largest _________ (you pick it)! Some small nugget even the passersby could feel proud of (“Did you know??”). Alas… Yet despite this tragic turn of a chance-narrative, I choose to believe that this city’s best days lie ahead. Kanorado, my thoughts are with you… Now go out and fucking WIN something!!